Top Banana

Get ready for this...

Top Banana is a vertically scrolling platformer not too dissimilar to Magic Boy or Rainbow Islands. Ignoring the stupid eco storyline, this has an unusual mix of weirdness but begins with a tripped-out acid-style intro that reminds me of Grotesque and Aciid Burn (Whattaheck). Well, a little, and it's in stereo so worth watching.

The gameplay is simple, we start at the bottom of the screen and leap upwards using the platforms whilst avoiding the rising water levels. Along the way are the unusual nasties and our weapon appears to be "love" itself. We deliver a fatal kiss of death to anything that gets in our way. So take no prisoners and enjoy killing loving everything!!

Considering this is a game full of eco-preservation, it contradicts itself by killing animals. Anyhow, you win when you reach the top and then the screen falls and you can collect lots of doughnuts and other items before starting the next stage. Nothing new or mind-blowing but I actually quite enjoyed this incredibly cr4p platformer!

Before we go any further, let's take a peep at the first screenshot (which is taken from the ST version)

Top Banana played on the Atari ST (the oldest model without a Blitter Chip)

Aesthetics

That's right, this is one of the few games taking advantage of the Atari STe, so kudos to Hex for going that extra mile. However, what do you think about these screenshots? The ST version is rather lacking with an empty feel whereas the STe is the complete opposite with a crazy display of mess scrolling along your monitor using parallax-scrolling. My eyes are bleeding, my head hurts... I think I'm going to die if I play for much longer!!

Top Banana is incredibly unique. Never have I seen a game with such a weird abstract style. I admit, at first, I hated it because it was cluttered so I would struggle to see the dangers ahead in time. After a few games, I eventually overcame that eye-burst feeling and was used to it. Well, I must applaud the artists for daring to be different.

Interestingly, Top Banana supports the Atari STe which features madenning graphical design! But it supports parallax scrolling and also comes bundled with DMA sound effects. These effects certainly beat the chirpy YM effects into dust but, (like the visuals) are possibly way OTT. Check out this Atari STe screenshot...

Top Banana on the Atari STe. Eye-bursting visuals albeit with parallel scrolling.

The CryptO'pinion?

Top Banana is unusual alright. It offers an enjoyable challenge and I've nothing but respect for Hex for supporting both Atari computers. However, it looks, sounds and plays drab on the ST whereas it's way OTT on the STe. In fact, Atari STe owners should take out health insurance because your ears might burst with the incredibly annoying samples and the bloated parallax-scrolling display will give you a headache or a brain tumour.

I do wonder what Hex was thinking when they made this weird little game. Having said that, it is also pretty good and obviously inspired by Rainbow Islands. Sadly, it's one that I fear everyone might ignore which is a shame. Okay, I wouldn't bother if you're an ST guy but I'm tempted to sadistically recommend it for all STe owners!!

The D-Bug boys have a hard drive version and Stonish has two floppy disk options you need to try:

 1)  Fuzion #151 (a one-disk download without the intro)

 2)  Pure Energy #6A and #6B (with the silly intro but it comes on two disks)

Hard 'n' Heavy

Looks familiar yet not...

Hard 'n' Heavy follows on from Giana Sisters in true sequel fashion to offer more Mario-esque levels to run and jump through. However, the official release was poor with awful flip-screen scrolling that ultimately ruined what might have been a great conversion. Sure, flip might work well with some platformers, for example, Jet Set Willy, as this game would have been horrendous with scrolling. But Hard 'n' Heavy requires scrolling!!

Thankfully, that's where the bad lesson ends and the good news begins because Peter Putnik has developed a version which features smooth-as-silk scrolling thanks to the use of the Blitter co-processor lurking inside every Atari STe. And also most other earlier models (incl later STFM models which had a Blitter or at least a hungry socket).

Hard 'n' Heavy obviously looks and feels similar to Giana Sisters, so if you didn't like that game then you may as well start looking elsewhere right now. The physics exaggerate the Giana experience to feel more like we're floating and this took me a few goes to master. It's pretty weird! Okay, there are 25 levels of shooting the baddies and destroying blocks to search for those bonuses and even access to hidden levels. Also available is a two-player feature, with various game types.

Wow, this is superb and I'm sure any Giana Sisters fan will love what is basically more of the same with a few extra bells and whistles. Peter has done well to transform that pathetic commercial conversion into something it should have been all along. Just make sure you play it on a real computer to experience the silky-smooth movement.

Overall, I do prefer Giana Sisters, but this upgrade is downright marvellous. Highly recommended!!

- Download Hard 'n' Heavy -

Zone Warrior

Wanna be a Timecop?

I love platform shooters and this one was developed in 1991 by Imagitec Design Ltd for Electronic Arts. The storyline is simple - once again, pesky aliens are giving us Earthlings lots of grief. They have managed to pinch a time machine and are using that to alter history and wreak havoc by taking crucial hostages from each period in an attempt to halt their influence. From the invention of the wheel to England's King Arthur uniting the Britains and Japan's technical wizardry.

Yep, we cannot allow this - the fight is on. So, brace yourself because it's our job to travel the various time zones and rescue everybody we can. Thus saving the timeline and protecting our future. Whilst there, we may as well kill each and every bad dude that gets in our way. Yup, it's time to save the day again so let's lock and load!!

Before we begin, check out this screenshot and tell me what other run & gunner it reminds you of...

Pick-ups are pretty cool but something like the Map parts is essential for this huge platformer!!

Are you ready for a challenge?

Zone Warrior is a MASSIVE horizontally scrolling platformer that reminded me of Psygnosis' Baal in looks with (more than) a hint of Turrican-style action. Each zone is a labyrinth of large rooms interconnected by a series of complicated doorways. There is a total of five timezones that need to be saved from the dreaded aliens and they are:

• Prehistoric - I really enjoyed this zone because it introduces you nicely into the gameplay style plus there are lots of power-ups and strong map designs compared to most other levels. I also thought the graphics were the best here with great use of the palette.

• Egyptian - This is is little disappointing for me because it's basically more of the same design but with a different graphics. However, I found it to be a lot harder and rather frustrating instead of anything close to an enjoyable challenge...

• Medieval - Saving the medieval Britons from their alien fate is a brilliant level and definitely on par with the Prehistoric Zone. I must admit, the music here is so gorgeous!

• Japanese - I would rate this as the best level of all because it is really challenging, with some great mechanics. Unlike the finicky Egyptian Zone, I found it tough but without the frustration. And the chipmusic is out of this world!!

• Holocaust - Sadly I didn't care for this zone... Very frustrating and ultimately annoying!

Travelling through most zones is a neat experience with constant action to keep your trigger finger happy. During this onslaught, look for hostages to free and a key for a final battle before you can progress to the next zone.

Each of these periods has its own nasties to contend with and some cannot be killed so avoid them - like the Venus flytraps and sharp spikes. However, most have legs or teeth so have your trusty Turrican-inspired weapon at the ready. This is a rapid-firing gun that performs well and can even be upgraded with a wider spread. Also, the spacebar is used to cycle through any extra weapons you may have picked up like bombs and mines. Experiment but use wisely.

Okay, let's check out another screenshot of Tur...Erm, no, I meant Zone Warrior...

I really enjoyed the prehistoric levels with dinos and cool methods used to avoid them!

Aesthetics?

The visuals aren't the best I've seen from my lovely Atari ST which isn't due to their quality but the lack of variety. The backdrops are nice but could have made better use of the palette for things like destructible blocks. Most sprites are well-drawn and detailed, especially the stripy dinos from the Prehistoric Zone. The scrolling is very good and perfectly responsive to our hero's fast/leaping movements, which is obviously essential to a running-gunner-shooter like this.

Overall, the Medieval and Japanese zones looked the best, I thought. Sexy visuals!

The audio is a blast with great sound effects used throughout. However, it's the music I really loved because everything is composed by Barry Leitch who created a wealth of fantastic chiptunes. Show-stompingly brilliant audio!!

Variety is certainly the spice of life <sarcasm incoming> so if you like yellow, you will love this next screenshot...

The graphics and music may change but the gameplay is pretty darn familiar for each level...

The CryptO'pinion?

The trouble with Zone Warrior is that it's all too easy to lose your bearings. The levels are absolutely huge and wandering from "room to room" can be overwhelming. This is also due to the lack of distinctive visuals so each region begins to feel repetitive. Thankfully, our little zone warrior can collect pieces of a map to help prevent him from getting lost but I personally thought this was poorly implemented. Yes, I lost my bearings... a lot... and that spoilt the fun somewhat.

Okay, with a little more variation in the graphics, to help distinguish between the locations, this would have knocked the spots of other platform shooters. This is a great game with interesting mechanics and incredibly responsive joystick controls. Okay, it might whiff of cheap Turrican perfume but I must say I have really enjoyed being a Zone Warrior.

Yep, Zone Warrior is a fantastic shooter and comes highly recommended by yours truly. Play it!!

 Update: we now have a hard drive installable game thanks to Peter @8BitChip.

 Stonish has the floppy disk download thanks to the Fuzion #80 disk :-)

  

Monster Business

The demoscene does it again?

Monster Business is a fun-themed platformer released in 1991 by Eclipse and produced by incredibly talented people you may recognise from the ST scene. As storylines go, this one is a Christmas cracker!!

Crazed "mad meanies" have been loosed from their forest habitat and are pinching items from Bob's construction site. You are Leroy The Beast Buster who must help Bob blow-up these cheeky invaders. Yep, this might sound like diarrhoea, but we should still help Bob because we are the only beast buster in Tin Town. Yep... O_o

Each level is big and uses smooth vertical scrolling to hunt down the freaky monsters!

Olde gameplay and it works!

Each level follows a familiar Bounty Bob design of platforms, slippy slopes and chasing monsters. Be careful because they kill with one touch so I'm grateful that we carry an air pump weapon to inflate them for a bloated and cruel death. This is nothing short of hilarious and once they begin floating away you are able to nudge them into oblivion, leaving behind their stolen goodies. If you're lucky, they might drag along others for multiple killings.

The joystick controls are spritely and I like how there are two heights we can jump - this depends on how long you push upwards. Repeatably pressing the fire button activates the weapon to bloat the monsters - so I appreciated the autofire function. Two-players are supported but sadly not for co-op, which would have been superb...

Blown the sucker up for a cruel, yet hilarious end to his life!

A pleasure for your eyes and ears!

The graphics are nice with simple backgrounds any 8-bit owner would have drooled over back in the early 80s. The scrolling is ultra-smooth but its the sprites which shine the most: I dare anybody not to laugh when seeing a ginormous duck waddle across your screen. I loved their expressions and bloated deaths. Hilarious pixel art.

Audio is immensely impressive with a superlative range of gorgeous chiptunes by Laurens Tummers, aka Lotus! The sound effects are also great but even so, are completely overshadowed by the music. Wow!!

Taken from behind and check out his expression. This game is brilliant!!!

The CryptO'pinion?

Bloating animals is shockingly entertaining and I guarantee you will enjoy hunting down cute prey. However, it's quite repetitive and this might reduce any long-term enjoyment. I also thought the time limit was too harsh... Monster Business is best with friends and I promise that everyone will be giggling like school kids. A superb game!!

Monster Business can be downloaded for floppy & hard drive.

Spellfire The Sorcerer

Yeah, we're a wizard!

Spellfire is a scrolling platformer developed by Dave Semmens for Code Masters and is set in a time long ago: a time of myth and legend when knights patrolled the woodlands and magicians were the cool guys. We're a wizard called Willy and our beef is with an emperor who is holding captive (wait for it) Fifi The Fairy in his tower so our valiant quest is to rescue her.

Fifi can only be rescued from the dark fortress by collecting ten magic eyes that are scattered across the levels. Yup, it's the usual quest through lands filled with monsters and demonic guardians. Will you help Wizard Willy?

Come on, I know you will so let's check out the first screenshot from the game...

The graphics are great but sometimes it feels cluttered with umm too much going on?

It all sounds incredibly original, right?

He begins his journey in a forest that leads to the castle where she is imprisoned. This is a great start which introduces us nicely to the gameplay mechanics: our hero can walk, leap, climb trees, shoot fire bolts and even mash up magic spells using a rather large cauldron. Health status is displayed at the top of the screen and will decrease if you happen to touch enemies or a dangerous object. Gold coins can be collected (after a kill) and these are used as currency inside a cauldron that can mix magical power-ups, ammo, or health.

Collecting the magic eyes allows us to battle the first guarding boss - a wasp-like critter who isn't exactly intelligent and therefore makes for an easy kill. This grants us access to the castle via the dungeons which are creepy but the guardian is a bit of a bonehead (you will see why). This castle takes us deeper into our quest but continues with the same theme, with lots more tricks and traps to fool you. I really am enjoying this journey!

This ain't no rushed port and the quest is massive so let's celebrate with another screenshot...

The first boss is a giant wasp who is a bit dumb and quite easy to kill. I like bosses like that!

Aesthetics

Spellfire has some stunning visuals and I love the contrast between the lush nature and medieval environments. Sadly, it can feel a little cluttered and I dreamt of a background without so much going on. However, the game is very colourful using a gradient sky which is gorgeous. I also liked the erupting volcanos and awesome skeletons when raised from the dead. Everything you see is complemented by smooth scrolling that never lags and keeps up with the pace.

The audio is almost as impressive and can be set to chip music or effects. Whatever you decide, you will love it.

Isn't it great when something looks and sounds as great as it plays! Screenshot time...

Watch out for tricks that will catch you out which makes for great replay value.

The CryptO'pinion?

I have enjoyed playing Spellfire The Sorcerer which reminded me of a cross between Stormlord and Chronicles of Omega. It's very easy to get into so instantly entertaining with good levels, excellent monsters and power-ups that work nicely. However, I did feel that the screens were a little too (visually) cluttered albeit very, very pretty.

I'm grateful this isn't a lazy Amiga port and one which plays every bit as good as it looks. Code Masters released what I can only describe as a hidden gem that will appeal to fans of the genre. Not perfect but a fantastic platformer!

Grab the HDD version @ 8BitChip or disks @ Stonish.

Magicland Dizzy

I'm so dizzy, my head is spinning...

Being a bit of an odd bod, I've never taken much time to play any of the Dizzy games so figured I should choose one from this hugely popular series and see where it takes me. I've decided on Magicland Dizzy, probably because I was reminded of Stormbringer from my Spectrum 128 days. Amusingly, I've gone and picked one which wasn't designed by the Oliver Twins but by Neal Vincent and programmed by Derek Leigh-Gilchrist of Captain Dynamo fame.

Magicland has been infected by an evil wizard. Yes, another evil wizard but he's not banked on Dizzy who plans on saving the day. Dizzy must explore Magicland and rescue six of his friends being held captive. To do this he must solve many puzzles, trade items and talk to the natives. Basically, what you'd expect following the same format.

Wanna see a scary screenshot? Well, it's not that scary but there is a hungry ghost...

Okay, the first demoed puzzle is easy. This scary dude is hungry so, feed him something nice!

Oi! egg head O_o

The graphics are beautiful with cartoon artwork by Leigh Christian (Magic Boy) which includes lots of neat animations and effects. Just look at that mean-looking troll in the animation above - it's better than watching Nick Jr. Thankfully, the audio hasn't been forgotten with stunning chip music to enjoy throughout. It's YM-tastic and I loved it!!

I love mapping ST games but I didn't make this one which you can check out right here...

I found this map on a Russian Dizzy website. Click twice - it's pretty BIG!!

So far so good?

Well, having only played for a short while today, I can honestly say I'm shocked at just how superb this is. The controls are spot-on perfect and (thankfully) I'm getting the distinct impression that my old brain won't be frustrated by any stupid puzzles. From what I've seen, each character will need something, so it's a case of finding out what and where that might be located. Simple, but always interesting without the irritation that this lazy adventurer initially expected!

Fantastic gaming and something I highly recommend. Have a blessed Easter everyone †

- DOWNLOADS -

Hard Disk or Floppy Disk.

Ghouls 'n Ghosts

Ghouls? Ghosts? I'm outta here....!!!

Today I thought that I would entertain myself with a few games of Ghouls 'n Ghosts, a classic platformer and a fantastic Atari ST conversion by Software Creations for US Gold. However, I only ended up laughing out loud whilst I suffered numerous deaths in utter frustration! For those that have been living on another planet, this is the sequel to Ghosts 'n Goblins, another game which I'm not particularly great at. Sigh... when will I ever learn?

This is a beautifully crafted conversion faithful to the original with rock-solid gameplay that will take many moons to master. The visuals are lovely with nice scrolling and superb sprites - who doesn't love it when Arthur bumps into a baddie and somehow loses his clothes? It sure doesn't make any sense but it has our 7-year-old laughing her cotton socks off which is a win in my book. In fact, all sprites are beautifully drawn with gorgeous details - just look at the buzzards as a wonderful example. Musically, Ghouls 'N Ghosts features captivating tunes and some of the most memorable I've ever heard. Just listen to the first level's music. Wow, it doesn't get better than this!!

Ghouls N Ghosts is such a tough game and also an arcade classic. The Atari ST received a fantastic conversion which looks great, sounds incredible and offers you the chance to enjoy the most frustrating action. Dare you accept this challenge? Of course, you do and those brave players can grab either the floppies or a hard disk version.

Check out these screenshots while you decide how brave you really are... Good luck!!

Beyond The Ice Palace

Brace yourself for a corker!

I think everyone has played Beyond The Ice Palace at some time in their life? I got mine free with my first Atari ST computer. Until that day, I was a Spectrum user, so I'm sure you can imagine the look on my face when first loading the ST version with its colourful graphics, smooth scrolling and jazzy sound effects. It was something else I can tell you!

Much like Ghosts & Goblins, this is a scrolling-platformer that involves three monster-infested levels. But there is something special about this platformer because Elite has everything spot-on perfect with awesome joystick controls to the vast variety of enemies within its tricky levels. It's interesting and playable so why couldn't every platformer be this good?

Right then, let's break this pointless trip down memory lane with a couple of funky screenshots...

I knew this game was gonna be great from the start but choose your weapon carefully.

Hey, I think I've found a severed head!! Hmm, what could it possibly be?

Play the game

The first level is a trip through scary woods and is pretty much the typical platformer environment with lots of peculiar baddies to encounter with a freaky end-of-level boss. Actually, each level follows the same formula with interesting places and many monsters to shoot/avoid/run away from. The second and third levels are, more or less, the same: a vertically scrolling cavern filled with hideous creatures before eventually reaching the wicked witch.

You're not alone: a good spirit can be summoned which helps clear the screen of the baddies. There are only so many times you are allowed this feature - a funny face is displayed in the status bar when one is ready to use. So choose your moments wisely when you are most vulnerable - then watch it zig-zag down your screen-killing baddies.

Ice Palace isn't complex but can sometimes be tricky due to awkward mechanics. For example, the blue demon is quite irritating as he cunningly appears just as you begin to use the elevating platforms. My advice is to leap off just at the moment he appears as it's easier to kill. Otherwise, you are stranded on the platforms and very vulnerable.

Hey, I think that we need two more screenshots of our hero with his flowing blonde locks...

Argh, you've blown it by staying on that life. Now the battle is much harder!

Oh no, here is the end-of-level green worm guardian!

A 16-bit jaw dropper

I've always felt the graphics were extraordinary for the period as they perfectly demonstrated our superiority over the 8-bit computers. The 80s were an era of no-lame-Amiga-ports so this game has been programmed well. The scrolling is smooth but the backgrounds are basic. However, each level looks great with gorgeous sprites. Heck, even dying is a beautiful moment and I'll never tire of the flicky death effect as my soul ascends into heaven. That is an amazing effect.

Sound effects are ravishing with a sharp arcade-like quality throughout. The music is by David Whittaker and plays alongside the sound effects using a technique we saw in Xenon. After all, there are only 3 YM channels. The music is awesome.

So it plays brilliantly whilst also looking and sounding superb too. What a game, eh? Screenshot time...

Level two ramps up the difficulty with weird wolfmen roaming the labyrinth!

Let's leap for joy, for we have collected another severed head!!

The CryptO'pinion?

I've sometimes found that Beyond The Ice Palace is a much-underrated platformer. This is odd because it holds a special place in my retro-gaming heart. Why? Well, it was one of the first games I booted up on Christmas morning in 1988. Just imagine how I felt seeing its graphics and hearing that music - they blew me away. What a time that was!

After all these years, it's still great fun and completely addictive thanks to great joystick controls, smooth scrolling and variety in gameplay. The only downside is the size of each level - I wish they were bigger.

Okay, he might wear cute green boots but I guarantee you will love this platformer. A cracking game!!

A Midi tune of the awesome game music.

Maps for the ZX Spectrum game, aren't needed but nice to have.

Downloads are available for hard drive installation or floppies.

My Hi-Score. Can you beat me????? No, you cannot is the answer! ;p

Nebulus

Pogo the frog? Oh boy, this is gonna suck

Nebulus was released in 1988 by one of my favourite gaming companies ever, Hewson. It features an armed frog with big eyes called Pogo. But he isn't too happy with the thought of eight large sea-based towers and decides they need climbing and blowing up! Essentially, this is a platformer with some interesting pseudo-3D mechanics that provide a pretty unique visual style within an ingenious design. This is class programming as you will soon discover...

All towers are cylindrical with several platforms dotted all around the outside and nifty tunnels which offer a great way to quickly access the opposite side - if the current route appears a dead end. The world certainly revolves around little Pogo because he remains at the centre of the screen with horizontal movements causing the screen to scroll in a "three-dimensional" circular motion. Thus turning the tower around into view, it's quite brilliant.

Sounds rather insane, right? But let's ignore that initial opinion to check out this colourful screenshot...

Talk about going the extra mile and NOT sticking to 16 colours! Absolutely superb.

Frogs love water, right?

Getting through any of the towers will never be easy thanks to a barrage of unusual nasties to either shoot or avoid - and one that flies by to conveniently get in your way. Access to the top will involve careful strategy because your route is broken thus forcing you to use opposite sides of the tower depending on where you are. Always consider the option of using these tunnels to quickly nip through, they might come in handy to avoid those flying obstacles!!

Nebulus may sound easy but, it's actually very challenging and a brisk time limit allows little room for error. Bumping into an enemy will drop you down to the previous ledge, which is fantastic because that doesn't necessarily mean a frustrating loss of life, nor will it impede your momentum as you pick yourself up to try that part of the tower all over again. However, if there isn't a ledge to land on, you might fall even further down thus requiring lots of hefty backtracking, which could prove too much if little time remains. Ohh, the pressure!!

Falling further still (and into the water) is strangely fatal for this froggy - the only frog ever to have existed who can't handle the deep waters. Yup, that means we lose a life! Also interesting is a bonus game is featured between the levels - this has Pogo travelling to his next tower via a nice horizontally-scrolling level. It's a shooter with lots of Psygnosis-busting smooth parallax scrolling! It should have been longer because I really enjoyed it a bunch.

Right then, you guessed it! Yep, it's time for another cool screenshot...

Another day and another tower to climb. Ahh, this one looks too easy, right?

16-Bit Sex Appeal!!

Throughout our adventure, the visuals are utterly tremendous. Nebulus is programmed by legend, John M Phillips, who also helped treat us to a lovely display of great artwork and ultra-smooth framerates. Not only that but he spared no idle cycles to burst the colour limit with a ton of extra shades for the backdrops. The end result is a game that puts others to shame. Isn't it incredible what the Atari ST could crank out - when programmed by somebody with talent and commitment?

The audio is equally impressive with gorgeous sound effects that are zesty and sharp totally suiting the gameplay styles. Also, a beautifully unique chiptune that I could leave running all day long... it's captivating. Totally enchanting audio.

This is how all 16-bit games should look and sound. And that was all in 1988 too. Wow!!

Okay, ignore my jerky capture because this part scrolls so smoothly. And is great fun!!

The CryptO'pinion?

Nebulus can feel daunting thanks to its hefty learning curve which is steeper than you might first expect. With lots of practice, I guarantee hours of addictive gaming because Nebulus is a real firecracker. I love how it integrates both arcade action and strategic thinking using a fascinating visual style. I think in many respects this game was ahead of its time.

Yes, it's pretty tough at first, but you will soon get the hang of this rather unique and wonderful shoot 'em up. In fact, I would personally rate it as an Atari ST classic thanks not only because of how it looks and sounds but the addictive gameplay. Enjoy this beautiful piece of JMP magic which is nothing less than an icon of the 16-bit era.

Floppies are available on Stonish

and 8BitChip has a hard drive version!

Potsworth & Co

Another platformer? Yawn, let's check it out...

Potsworth & Co is a cutesy platformer developed by Ben Walshaw for Hi-Tec Software (1992) and is based on a Hanna-Barbera cartoon (which I'd never heard of). I've just learnt that Potsworth is a dog who happens to have a group of kiddy mates - The Midnight Patrol. The story is, someone has stolen a sleep potion and then broken it up throughout five worlds so, it's up to the kids to return it to a Grand Dozer. Whatever that is!!

We are different members of the Midnight Patrol depending on the level and each has different mechanics for powers and abilities. For example, in the first, we are a girl who looks stroppy and she begins underground in a place Rick Dangerous would love. It appears our heroine only has to open her mouth to kill most of her foes.

Sounds weird? You betcha! But I think you're gonna love it. Read on...

Each level is different and uses the other characters, who come with their own skillset.

Developers who care!

Potsworth & Co offers gaming styles similar to Doodlebug or Magic Boy but, don't let the comical visuals trick you, this game is not easy and is actually challenging. Each world features many hazards and, of course, a wide range of baddies who aimlessly walk back and forth doing their best to make life troublesome. There are also puzzles but these won't have you stumped, it's more like moving a block onto a switch panel (or a teddy bear!).

Actually, this isn't an easy-to-pick-up-and-play platformer, if I'm being honest. I think it has a testing learning curve thanks to a difficulty level famous throughout the 8 and 16-bit era. Personally, I think a lot more lives should have been given by default and there are some parts of the later levels that are quite irritating. But all this is solved by having more lives or (cough) a trainer which means you're then able to enjoy this game fully.

The controls are a joy and very responsive so exploring is a breeze without any sluggishness. When you finally move onto a new level, the game changes your character which is quite the twist. I especially liked the third world where we play as a dog in a candy land which is bursting with cool mechanics and is positively brilliant fun to explore.

No lame port here but there are... walking guns in a Ricky Dangerous world!

Model looks!

The visuals are stunning. Absolutely stunning and it certainly proves what a developer can do when they care about their product. This looks the business alright and feels quite console-y with fantastic environments, awesome sprites, and bundles of colour throughout each and every level. The scrolling is both fast and fluent which means we're being treated, rather than enduring a jerky lame Amiga port. Amazing, just amazing.

Sadly, the audio is the mirror opposite of those lovely pixels and appears to be nothing more than an afterthought. There are only a few spot sound effects and, even worse, no background chiptune which would have been perfect. Oh, and don't even ask about a title theme. That is absolutely terrible and should be skipped - quickly!!

Why is that? So much effort was spent on the visuals and gameplay yet little on the audio...

Another new level and another different character to master.

The CryptO'pinion?

Overall, this is superb and provides a fantastic venture through several interesting worlds. Each is a vibrant and fascinating experience in its own right and, not only that but a testament to the power of the Atari ST when in the hands of a talented programmer. Prepare thyself for a game that is as challenging as it is beautiful.

This is one of the best 16-bit platformers I've played. I have loved every second with The Midnight Patrol so, if I can pass on a piece of advice, it would be this: Don't be a knob and download this fantastic game right now. There ya go.

Downloads for floppy disk & hard drive.

Crash Time Plumber

New game alert!

Crash Time Plumber is a conversion of the Gamopat original which was released at Silly Venture demo party. The Atari game was developed by none other than Sebastien Lucas of Cerebral Vortex and it will work on any Atari computer with a Blitter Chip: check the Options screen in GEM but all late models of STfm, Mega ST, Atari STe, and Falcon should be a-ok. Many STfm computers have an empty socket just waiting to be used:

* Many newer STFMs have an empty Blitter Chip socket so head over to the EXXOS webSTore.

At first, I wasn't sure how this was gonna go as we've been burnt by so-called 8-bit conversions before. However, this booted up great with a neat intro and looks the business! Based on Donkey Kong with a dollop of Popeye, it's set in 1983 as the gaming industry crashed (which I was completely unaware of being a Spectrum kid then!)

Anyhow, an Italian plumber has teamed up with an angry-looking monkey and kidnapped ten gaming heroes: Pac-Man, Pitfall Harry, Q-Bert, Frogger, and others. They are all preparing for a hideous death at the hands of these criminals from the East so go and rescue them all to foil Mario's plan and stop this invasion.

Sounds cool, right? It is and so is the intro too which begins in Alamogordo (I've been here!)...

The intro is sweet and tells a good story. Also, I've been to Alamogordo, NM. #tidbit

Hang on, this looks familiar?

Taking place on the donkey kong construction site, we run along girders collecting love hearts given away by a damsel in distress. She floats by in her hot air balloon and, when enough are collected, we begin a steroid-jumping rescue to the top of the screen and save a trapped hero. Once he's free, we can move on to the next level.

This isn't easy because, not only is Mario rolling barrels downhill, but King Kong is hanging about throwing deadly killer bananas at us with annoying accuracy! Some levels have weather conditions affecting your movement and there's even a harsh 120 seconds time limit. This makes things quite difficult after a few levels!

The game ends once each and every gaming hero has been rescued. Easier said than done...

Watch out for angry monkeys throwing their killer bananas or you're DEAD!!

One smooth looker!

The graphics are fantastic! A gorgeous 80s retro theme with cute sprites and the Blitter delivers a smooth 50fps display. Heck, the Atari STe even adds enhanced colour fading and Falcon owners get to witness a huge Zeppelin flying by - which I cannot help but wonder why that's missing on the STe? Ignoring that moan, this game is ace!!

The audio is also superb with lovely sound effects and a simple chiptune that is also totally suited to the ye olde style. A lot of effort has gone into both the visuals and sounds and I dare that jingle not to stay in your head all day!

Everything is just dandy and perfect in with a retro and comical design...

Beautiful girl blowing kisses? Come back, my love!

The CryptO'pinion?

Don't be fooled by the humble 8-bit appearance. From the start, you're tricked into thinking this is going to be easy but the combination of fantastic controls and tough mechanics will catch you out. I'm sick of being smacked in the face by a killer banana... but I keep on being dragged back for more of this torment... Am I insane, no this game is!!

Crash Time Plumber is extremely hard but it manages to drag you back for more - kicking and screaming.

Download for FLOPPY / HARD DISK

Chubby Gristle

Oi Fatso!!

This is a story of a fat, obnoxious parking attendant who loves to eat food - a pillar of the community! Chubby Gristle is always hungry and will roam each room looking for grub to nosh on for Grandslam Entertainment's 1988 platformer. This is a platformer and initially feels like many games I played on my ZX Spectrum. Never a bad thing.

Each screen is designed in a similar fashion to Monty Mole however, Chubby Gristle is incredibly tough and perhaps too difficult for the average gamer? As with all platformers, each screen has ledges, moving platforms, ropes, and the expected angry sprites zipping back n' forth which are often awkward to avoid (without losing a precious life).

Visually, it's perfectly 8-bit with 16-bit enhancements. And I mean that in a good way because it happily blasted me back into the 1980s. The sprites move smoothly and are animated using a style I adore - Peter Harrap would be proud. However, I am disappointed with the audio which plays the same tune over (and over). It's great, but we really needed a varied selection and I oddly, found no way to replace that with the sound effects?

Chubby Gristle could have been a hit but the basic mechanics fail due to a difficulty that is off the scale. There's so much going on and it's all too easy for the fat man to bump into something or fall flat on his face. I feel many extra lives are needed to balance things out. There are some great screens but you won't get to see them without cheating...

This is a game that loves to see you suffer. Whoever playtested this should be shot!!

* Klaz' Hideaway who has the floppy and a hard drive installable game (with lives cheat).
* I've recorded a video of my dispare, dare you view it?

* Cheating is never good but Chubby needs extra lives like no other game on the planet. To enable infinite lives, type "buuurrp" on the title screen. You will hear a burp that confirms success. (untested by me) 

Terry's Big Adventure

It's-a-me, Terry!

Terry and his Big Adventure was released in 1989 by Gary Walton for Shades. It plays with more than a pinch of Mario (I cannot help but wonder how moneybags Nintendo let them get away with this, but I'm glad they did). His adventure takes us through twelve lands and, just like his Italian cousin, he is also stuck within a 2D world of silliness so get your joystick ready because this means lots of platforms, gaps to jump, magic mushrooms and iddy biddy critters.

Terry isn't a mean guy and he certainly doesn't like squashing any living creature so instead, has brought his own weapon of choice. Now, if you're expecting something like a shotgun or a sword then you might be disappointed because it's actually a yo-yo. Okay, this is unlikely to impress the girls but it's different... and kinda works very well too.

Power-ups are frequently available and you can exchange the yo-yo for pebble throwing by hitting the spacebar. Terry is such a badass, right? Many kills will reward a random letter in a tiny parachute, collect 'em and eventually make the word "terry" to earn a temporary shield. This comes in handy allowing you to plough through the enemy hoard.

Also, it's worth collecting the mushrooms for juicy points with an extra life awarded every 20,000 points. There are bonus levels stocked to the brim with even more mushrooms - just don't get yourself addicted!

The Atari ST cannot scroll, right? Well, that's what the talentless programmers say...

Visuals, Sounds, Controls.

Personally, I thought that the graphics are NES in style. The first thing to notice? The tiny sprites but these suit the console experience perfectly and everything you see is colourful and detailed. Scrolling is silky smooth and it's obvious Gary took pride in his work and achieved beautiful results - using a computer without any hardware scrolling.

The audio is a little disappointing with the option of chip music or sound effects. The tunes are cute and my preferred choice in comparison to the dullness of the sparse sound effects. Don't get me wrong, the effects are okay but few and far between - so much of your gameplay will be in silence. Stick with the music!

Any Mario game needs responsive controls and Terry has it for a precise feel that is great. It's perfectly "console" which I know sounds odd but it's true! This also works hand in hand with the laws of physics which means how and when to use the Yo-Yo. This beastly weapon has a knockback that affects Terry - so watch out for that when near water. Splosh!!

Terry's world is filled with colour and little cute things. But even little cute things can hurt!

The CryptO'pinion?

Terry's Big Adventure is such a great platformer and one that will appeal to those who enjoy Giana Sisters or the Stario games. It might very well be a total ripoff but Terry has enough personality of his own to make this feel interesting and entertaining. The only kicker for me is never knowing about this wonderful platformer back in the day...

Yup, I thoroughly enjoyed playing yo-yos with my new spiky-haired friend. What a fantastic platformer!!

Download for floppy or hard disk.

Venus The Flytrap

Gremlin predicted this 30+ years ago!

Planet Earth is dying because of mankind's habit of breeding like bacteria and raping all its natural resources to serve our gluttony. Well, some rubbish like that anyhow... But, for this game, the over-use of pesticides has finally killed off all the bugs and left mother nature unbalanced but we have created cybernetic bugs to compensate for our stupidity. Of course, it wasn't long before they went postal so we must eliminate them all before it's too late!

This is a run and kill 'em all platformer spread over fifty levels ranging from the green forests to Death Valley. You're a mechanical bug equipped with a cannon to fight off the foes and this can be upgraded using the power-ups left behind by those crazy insects. These consists of a wide range of improvements like better firepower, silly reversible controls, and even antigrav upside-down walking being possible - and that only serves to give brain ache! Bonus rounds appear each way through a level and flip the game into an exciting shoot 'em up for extra points.

Controls are bang-on perfect with a style that is clean and responsive without ever lagging. The graphics are pretty darn beautiful with smooth scrolling and nicely animated sprites plus it's worth noting all those many extra colours which spruce up what would normally have been a boring background. The music is perfect, something I can listen to all day.

Venus The Flytrap is an extremely enjoyable platformer which has always been on my favourite list. Great game!

* I also recorded a midi version of the game's excellent theme tune.

* An awesome remastered tune by ACC:Xess which completely blows you away!

* Okay, here is a hard drive installable copy of Venus by the mighty D-Bug to download.

* Those that require a floppy disk image should check out Old Games Finder.

* Fancy some level codes? Of course, you do! Simply press the SPACEBAR on the menu screen and then ignore using that handy keyboard because they decided that the joystick would be far better to enter these codes:

     -> The Forbidden Forest...starting level

     -> The Frozen Wastes......MANTIDS

     -> The Dead City..........CICADAS

     -> Wood World.............PSYLLIDS

     -> The Kaverns............PIERIDS

     -> Death Valley...........SATYRID

     -> The Creeping Swamp.....LYCAENID

     -> Tech World.............PYRALID

     -> Translucent Plain......NOCTUID

     -> The Stygian Creek......?

* I believe these cheat codes work fine, however, I have never tried them so YMMV... enjoy:

     -> extra time.............JUPITER

     -> extra ammo.............PLUTO

     -> weapons galore.........MARS

     -> fly like superman......MERCURY

     -> unknown................SATURN

Creatures

Cute & Cuddly Gaming

Somewhere in the far reaches of the universe is a planet called Blot. Much like early Eden, this is a wonderful place; everything is perfect and everyone is happy. The inhabitants are little creatures called the Blotians. However, for some peculiar reason, these guys got bored with their paradise and wanted something better so came up with the daft notion of a brand new identity - on a different planet. They're now called Fuzzy Wuzzies!!

Creatures was released in 1992 by Thalamus and programmed by Philip Watts of WJS Design. Yes, he of Leander and Ork, two decent scrolling games you should check out.

What these sad creatures didn't realise was that evil demons already lived on this new planet. And are a very bad-tempered bunch too! Needless to say, they should have been happy where they were because everyone has been captured and awaited a cruel and bloody fate. You are Clyde Radcliffe, your breath stinks terribly but it is your job to rescue all of your simple-minded friends from these vicious fiends! So good luck - you'll need it.

This sounds simply insane and I love that!! So let's view an authentic screenshot taken with my phone...

Actually, this is quite sadistic!

Clyde is the cutest thing and is equipped with a rapid-firing weapon, which is handy because many of the baddies annoyingly take numerous. Power-ups are available, I love the 'wriggler' effect the most but there are many others to choose from. However, your superpower is the funniest weapon of all, press and hold the fire button to breathe bad breath over anything that gets too close. A bad-breathed hero must surely be a first?

A good tip for Creatures is to not rush it. The enemies can take more than a few hits which is a little weird and can often feel a little OTT. Try to kill what's already on the screen before moving on and being overrun by evil cute critters. Okay, that's a simple and obvious tip, but there ya' go. Take it or leave it!

Controlling Clyde is a cinch thanks to great joystick controls and fantastic level designs which are fun to navigate. The monsters come in all sorts and always manage to bring a smile to this ugly mug of mine thanks to great attention to detail and cruel personalities. End-of-level scenes are particularly cruel (but funny) but employ a harsh time limit before a fellow Fuzzy Wuzzy meets their bloody death at the hands of a sadistic demon!

Wait! It's not screenshot time. Oh, no let's jazz this up with a video recording...

Sexy Pixels & Smooth Audio?

I love the lush aesthetics with beautiful colours and stunning artwork - the attention to detail is amazing. Wow, the sprites are as cute as they are evil, this game looks the part alright and never fails to impress. However, everything might look nice, but is spoiled by rubbish push-scrolling! Sure, that method works fine for games like Rick Dangerous, but not here.

The audio is excellent with a cool theme tune that has you bobbing away to its funky beats. I love it. Also, the sound effects are making use of the DMA hardware - if you're lucky enough to own an Atari STe? If so, they are ace!!!

Righto, let's break up the silence! The shock of that push scrolling means we have another screenshot...

The CryptO'pinion?

Creatures is very enjoyable with well-balanced gameplay and a fantastic (and sadistic) sense of humour. However, it was originally designed as a scrolling platformer and a scrolling platformer needs to SCROLL. So, it sadly falls short of the mark compared to other versions as it's hampered by what appears a rushed port. Maybe I'm too fussy? Tell me!

Don't get me wrong, Creatures is worth downloading because it is a good game with a superb theme, humour, controls and audio. However, it's a massive shame they didn't make full use of the Atari STe or even push the STfm like so many other companies did with their platformers already out by 1992. The list is near endless so what was stopping Thalamus?

Help Clyde now and grab it on floppy & hard drive.