Road Wars

There's always one

For the most part, my Super Pack run has been a glowing success, featuring lots of brilliant games. Okay, there's been a couple of bumps along the way, but that's only to be expected, and even Atari wasn't able to please everybody all the time. Although I seriously doubt I will load up Chopper X or Marble Madness again.

Up next is Road Wars by Melbourne House, which looks like Eliminator meets Wipeout. Apparently, a computer controls the safety mechanisms of the highways, but it isn't working properly. The roads are no longer safe (it was running on Windows). So hop into your Battlesphere droid and rid the roads of menaces!

Righto, let's take a little pause and check out a couple of screenshots...

Weirdly, I like that the title screen gets straight to the point.

It even comes with the instructions!

Fast & Furious!

Road Wars is a 3D racer, but instead of a car, we're a mounted gun sliding down a yellow highway. We're inside something called a Battlesphere, which looks like a giant bowling ball that acts as a shield. Inside, you’re safe but unable to fire. Leaving that safety exposes you to vulnerability, but you can fire! Two players are supported, and solo gamers will be happy to see the computer automatically assume the role of an absent friend.

Controls are easy: move left/right, and pushing UP activates the Battlesphere's shield to hide in. Pulling DOWN removes that, so you can kill stuff using the fire button. The controls work well, but there is a noticeable lag when things get busy. I also found it too easy to kill my friendly opponent. Clumsy me... Oops!

The highway is walled on both sides with several types of enemies and other problems. Some wall panels are blue and fire electricity across the highway. Shooting either panel will disable that, or hide inside the safety of the Battlesphere, and roll through! When both panels are gone, you're free to zip onto the next level.

We're not alone! Beware and look out for the dangers on these futuristic yellow roads:

• Red balls. Yup, red balls. These can kill you with one touch unless you're shielded - but even then, it'll completely destroy your shield, leaving you vulnerable. These can also appear in clusters, which obviously gives you much more to shoot at. Also, beware of those that turn into missiles!!
• Chevrons are an unusual surprise, and it's worth rolling over one...
• Spikes are a pain in the rear end, so cloak up quickly and hide inside your protective shield!
• Satellites frequently flyby and some can fire a deadly laser beam.
• Barriers are quite fun and something to enjoy ramming through. Well, if cloaked!

Yeah, this game is a little bonkers, so let's dump a couple of screenshots here...

We begin on Electric Avenue, hunting down the evil villain, Eddy Grant.

No, not really!! :p

Aesthetics

The graphics are truly drab. The only redeeming feature is the loading screen, which features the two developers and has a demoscene vibe. I also like the moon animation, though it’s not particularly impressive - I still liked it... However, the most disappointing aspect is the ridiculously sluggish framerate. Ugh!!

The audio is incredibly annoying with a single tune constantly playing. It’s incredibly aggravating.

Wow, that's not good, is it? Screenshots are inbound...

Taking screenshots is usually a mad rush during the fun of frantic gameplay.

Not during Road Wars! Yawn...

The CryptO'pinion?

Road Wars had the potential for greatness, but its limited design ultimately let it down. The repetitive gameplay, laggy controls, poor framerate, and constant bad music only made matters worse. This is undoubtedly one of the most disappointing games I’ve ever played, and I’m struggling to find anything positive to say.

All I have to say is this: Road Wars comes on the same disk as Chopper X. I rest my case.

Masochists will be happy to find this at AtariMania!!